Green Eggs n' Ham Soup

I do not like to eat my peas
I will not eat them if you please
I will not eat them fresh and snappy
Steaming them won't make me happy
Those nasty things won't pass my lips
Unless you cook them into bits.
If you soak them beyond recognition
I will eat them of my own volition.
If Instead you call it Green Eggs and Ham Soup,
I'll swig it all down, that tasty green moss goop.
I do so like a Dr. Seuss reference.
It turns my least favorite food into my preference.

That is the story of how my oldest child come to request his least favorite food on a consistent basis. Here's the recipe if you want to try your own little bit of crock pot magic.

Green Eggs n' Ham Soup

Ingredients
1 onion, diced
2tbs butter
2 tsp minced garlic
7 cups water
16 oz package of diced ham
4-5 bacon slices
1 lb dried split peas
2 carrots, peeled and diced
1 celery rib, sliced
2 thyme sprigs
2 bay leaves
Salt and pepper to taste

Directions:
Rinse peas and dump them out onto a cookie sheet. Pick out any pebbles, dirt, or suspicious looking almost-peas and discard. The peas that passed inspection go in the crock pot. Saute onions, garlic and butter in a small skillet until onions are soft. Scrape them into the crock pot and add the remaining ingredients except for the diced ham. Cook on low for 6-8 hours. Half an hour before you serve, pull out the bacon strips, thyme and bay leaves and discard. Add ham, stir and replace the crockpot lid. Serve with a drizzle of balsamic vinegar and croutons.

*Adapted for the crock pot and my cooking style from America's Test Kitchen Modern Ham and Split Pea Soup

Major Award Kettle Corn

I won an award for "most unique dessert" at the ward Christmas party for my Norwegian Kringle. Kringle is the offspring of biscotti and chocolate chip cookies bent in the form of a pretzel. When Brother Miene handed me the award he said it was for "that race track looking thing". Yeah. "Most Unique Dessert" is the equivalent of a participation ribbon mixed with a hint of "do I dare eat it?" But I don't even care, because my prize was this never-used-straight-from-Desert-Industires-Whirley-Pop. And it is the best thing I've ever won. It even trumps my weather-photo-of-the-day umbrella from the local TV station. I will never pop popcorn in the microwave again (Okay. That's a lie. I probably will because I'm lazy like that, but I vow to not enjoy the eating of it nearly as much). We made two batches of kettle corn last night and ate all but the four un-popped kernels at the bottom. It was the crispiest, freshest, warmest popcorn I've had the pleasure of eating. Best. Prize. Ever. 

Major Award Kettle Corn

Ingredients

1/2 cup popcorn kernels

1/4 cup Orville Redenbacher's Popping & Topping oil

1/3 cup granulated sugar

1 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp salt

Directions

Pour oil into your Whirley-Pop (or covered pan) and tip it from side to side until bottom of pan is evenly coated and toss in three test kernels. Cover and warm over medium heat. While oil is warming, mix sugar and cinnamon in a bowl. When you hear the test kernels pop, dump in your popcorn, turn the handle (or stir) until kernels are evenly distributed and then pour sugar mixture in. Crank the handle (or stir) continuously to avoid burning your popcorn or sugar while the kernels heat up. Cook until handle becomes difficult to turn or the popping slows down to one pop every two or three seconds. Remove from heat and pour into a large bowl. Sprinkle with salt and stir. 

Taco Salad

Ingredients:
1 bag tortilla chips
1/2 lb hamburger, browned*
1 Taco seasoning packet
2 Tbs water
2 cups corn (I use freezer corn)
1 can black beans, drained and rinsed.
 2 hearts of romaine or green lettuce rinsed and chopped
1/2 cup chopped tomatoes
1 avocado, sliced

Toppings
Ranch dressing
Grated cheese
Sour cream
Salsa

Instructions:
In a microwave safe bowl, mix browned hamburger, taco seasoning and water. Microwave until warm. In a separate microwave bowl, heat black beans until warm (about two minutes). Do the same for the corn.

Prepare lettuce, tomatoes and avacado, and place each in a sperate bowl.

Place a layer of chips on your plate. I like to crunch them up for the kids, but I leave them on the side for myself and use them to scoop the salad with. Then add lettuce, beans, corn, tomatoes, avocados and any toppings you desire.

*I brown hamburger in giant batches whenever it's on sale and keep it in the freezer until I'm ready to use it. It makes meal preparation very simple and saves me money.

MkHuffin (a make at home cousin to that other famous breakfast sandwich)

Ingredients
English muffin
Frozen pre-cooked sausage patty
Fake cheese*
One egg, beaten

Directions
Toast an English muffin. Cook egg in a skillet over med-high and push to the side of pan so it keeps warm, but is off the direct heat. In that space you just made, warm a sausage patty. (I buy them in bags in the freezer aisle.  Put the scrambled egg and sausage patty on the muffin bottom, add cheese and then the muffin top. The English muffins and the sausage patties keep well in the freezer so you can have these on hand for whenever. I like to eat them with fresh grapes. Yum.

* (American cheese, maybe?  Those plastic wrapped slices of nastiness. What a shame we put or name on that shiny stuff. They melt so nice though. This is the ONLY thing I like them on).

Monte Cristos

It's breakfast and dinner all in one. My family hasn't decided weather to call it binner or deakfast, but once this goodness hits the table, their mouths are too full to talk anyway.

Ingredients
2/3 cup milk
2 eggs
1 loaf french bread sliced into 10-12 pieces.
5 slices swiss cheese
5 slices ham
powdered sugar
strawberry jam

Instructions
Warm skillet on medium-high. Place a foil lined cookie sheet in the oven and heat oven to 200⁰. Whisk milk and eggs in a wide, shallow dish. Assemble sandwiches (cheese and ham between two slices of bread). Dip contact side in egg wash (try not to get the sides in the egg dip, as they will not be cooked). Fry on skillet until the exterior is golden brown and the cheese is melted. Place each sandwich in the oven to keep warm until they are all done. Sprinkle with powdered sugar and serve a puddle of strawberry jam and sides of potato wedges and broccoli. Don't forget to turn off the oven!

Hobo Dinner

Politically insensitive name aside, these foil packet meals are sooo yummy. My favorite thing about this is the clean-up. If you eat out of the foil packet, it's next to nothing. The prep time is minimal too. I use a food processor to slice my vegetables, but a mandolin or a sharp knife will do just as well.

Ingredients

2 packets of dry onion soup mix
2 onions (I prefer yellow)
4 boneless skinless chicken breasts
8 carrots
8 potatoes
8 butter pats (roughly a Tbs. each)
4 oblong aluminum foil sheets

Instructions
Move oven racks to middle high and middle low positions. Heat oven to 350⁰. Peel onions, carrots and potatoes and slice into 1/4 inch pieces and them into their own separate bowls. On the foil, layer one quarter of the each ingredient in the following order: potatoes on bottom, then carrots, onions, chicken, dry soup mix (about half a packet sprinkled over all). Finish with two pats of butter on top. Gather long ends of foil together and fold down into a tight seam. Do the same with the short edges. You should end up with a flat, tight packet of food. Place packets on cookie sheets and bake in oven for 1 hr. Check temperature. Chicken should register at least 165⁰. Watch for steam as you unwrap packets. It's very hot and you don't want to get burned.

Steamed Broccoli

This is so basic, but you've gotta know it. Broccoli is one of the fastest, tastiest and easiest vegetables to prepare.  Just wash it, trim it, place it in a microwave safe dish with a 1/2 inch of water (about a thumbnail deep), cover it and microwave it for 4 minutes ( full power in 1.65 kw microwave. You may have to adjust your time if your settings are different than this). Broccoli should be fork tender, bright green and not soggy. Drain off the liquid, add a pat of butter and a sprinkle of salt and pepper. Done!